Last night I sent an email asking you to join me in a journey looking at what it means to Abide Well. If you missed that last email click here to read it. With some sage advice from a friend, I decided, let’s just get this done quick. After my three boys get a bedtime story each night, I’ll write up and shoot you an abide email too! I’m only partially joking, I’ve been working up the courage to send these articles for months, some were written in 2024. But really, you’ll get an email every evening this weekend. Don’t unsub just yet.

I’ll keep the emails shorter, I promise! Griffy (my youngest) falls asleep each night two sentences into my story, just promise me you’ll make it longer than that. (You already have, good job)

1 John 2:6
“Whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which He walked.”

Ask Questions

While we lived in Eswatini I worked with every mission team who came through the orphanage. This was about 200 people per year. I was with them every day they were on the ground. Most of them were a pleasure to work with. A handful of those great people, however, stand out among the crowd. They brought something with them – not materials possessions, not skill, not the most bible knowledge – they brought Jesus’ heart.

The best visitors were endlessly curious and engaging, asking questions every step of the way. There’s always this correlation that is interesting – those who ask the most questions make the best missionaries. I had the pleasure of hosting 2 such visitors once again in early April! And so I want to take a look at the connection between asking questions and walking like Jesus.

Jesus asked over 300 questions in the Gospels. In contrast, he directly answers only a few of the 183 questions he is asked. He seemed to value engagement with people above immediate solution-finding. That sounds so inefficient. Solutions are important! But I think the point is that people matter most, and most of the time, our solutions aren’t really that great, unless we are asking the right questions. 

Lessons Learned the Hard Way

In 2011 I was on my 2nd trip to Haiti and “ready for the assignment”. We were supposed to paint a house for a widow. Well I was running a painting business in the Seattle area, so I was keen to be useful on this trip. I picked out the paint, we drove over an hour into a rural area where this widow lived. We unloaded and a local man asked us “where is the water”? Well, I didn’t know this, but this type of paint in Haiti is manufactured to be diluted with water. We had no water available other than drinking water. 

The pastor drove back, filled buckets full of water, and returned. I grabbed a bucket of paint and started to shake it up the way I normally would have in the States. Again, this wasn’t America and that paint didn’t come from Sherwin Williams. I grabbed the 5 gallon bucket by the handle and gave it a pump. The lid came off and the paint poured onto the ground. True story. It is a wonder that I didn’t retire from mission work right then and there…

How would I have known that paint in Haiti is supposed to be diluted? How would I have known that there would be no water at the job site? The best question might have been, why was I in charge of anything at all? 

Applicable Anywhere

One of my favorite authors lately is Abraham Joshua Heschel. Heschel wrote

“True faith is not about having all the answers, but about living in the tension between mystery and meaning, continually seeking and trusting in the process… We are closer to God when we are asking questions than when we think we have all the answers.” 

Paradoxically, true faith thrives on uncertainty. Certainty is important concerning many issues of belief as well. There is a balance to be had. Jesus flipped tables after all. But prideful overconfidence in one’s self leaves no room for trust, wonder, or a leap of faith. Heschel believed that true faith was not about having all the answers. We are closer to God and walking in the same way Jesus walked with this humble approach to life. 

In many contexts, ministry may involve long-term relationships and efforts to address systemic issues—poverty, education, healthcare, etc.—that cannot be “fixed” quickly. We are called to trust in the process. To balance our focus between results and relationships—understanding that the work itself is sacred and that the quiet moments of listening, engaging, and serving are where we may be doing our best abiding.

This applies to everything. To our theology, our work, our relationship with our spouse, and, when we are painting a house.

In an uncertain world full of challenges, ministry can be about finding solutions, but also about listening, learning, and growing together.

So, be more like Jesus and less like me. Ask a lot of questions and don’t spill the paint.